Tigger

Saturday, August 05, 2006

a walkin corpse...

Time seems to pass vez slowli for mi at hm.. silent n quiet is the onli words tt i can say.. woke up bcaz of nightmare but indirectli i managed to watch the 'doraemon'.. was feelin quiet dead n lame todae...

Thought everythin is over, but somehw feel tt it's onli the startin.. din ve the mood to go to work, but gt no choice.. the moment i reached there, c the crowd, onli gt one word 'sianx'.. n i juz cant wake myself up, was stil in the half-sleepin n half-awake mood, though i was like woke up quiet earli.. then in the end, made quite a few mistakes...

Time at work passed so quickli, i din even had the time to thin abt anythin, or rather take a breather (did i spell correctli??) n we were so busy tt i had my lunch at 5pm.. haha.. din had the mood to joke around wif my friends, juz simply keep my mouth shut.. dun feel like listenin to anyone out there..

Had to work til 10.30pm caz angie din go for work, but an hr din make any difference for mi, caz i reali gt nth to do.. the longer i work, the lesser i thin.. haha.. dun noe wat i tokin also la.. siao liao le..thin should go n visit IMH soon.. yesterdae nite n todae mornin, my friends were like all askin mi whether i m ok or nt.. i said ok, but honestli speakin, i thin i m ok~~ N i noe wat i m doin, wat i should do, but sometimes i juz simply canot brin myself to do it.. tt's the reason.. mayb i thin i need a time to reali recover or rather finish my thoughts.. i thin tt may take a long time ba.. I wil juz let my heart rule everythin nw, dun wish to thin too much, it's so tirin..

Mayb i should stop all my nonsense n laughter, juz simply silent.. keep my mouth shut, n dun tok unnecessary.. my mind was like totali in a mess nw.. dunnoe wat i should do.. the onli thin tt i noe is tt i should follow my time-table tt is already well-planned, nt the way i wan it to be.. mayb tt wil stop mi from thinkin other thins.. haha... I juz dun feel like tokin nw, abt anythin.. plz, dun care so much abt mi, juz leave mi alone caz i dun wan to b a burden to anyone out there.. i hate bein the Lena tt i m nw~~

But i hope i wont show attitude to anyone but i simply canot take it.. after a day of wearin a mask out there.. havin to smile n look hapy, i m reali tired, but i ve gt no choice caz this is work.. on my way back hm, i saw a funeral at the void deck.. n somehw i was in vez deep thought.. life is so short~~

I simply dun noe wat i m tokin abt nw, juz plain typin crap, n if u find this post borin, sorx abt it.. caz there is reali too much uncertainty, i suddenli feel tt i reali dun understand myself, n i dun noe wat i wan in life..

Lena Thng blogged @ 11:21 PM